Hello! I’m struggling for now 4 years without telling it to anyone. I’m just not happy and I’m done feeling like this. I always thought that that was just a phase and it would go away with time but everything got worse when I entered middle school, I started having strong body image issues, I even got an eating disorder for two years. But since summer 2015, I kind of controlled this eating disorder and I’ve been eating “normally” since. But throwing up every time I was eating was my way to feel like I was in control, but since I tried to recover from it, I feel like I have nothing in control, so I found this feeling of control in self-harm but my anxiety got even worser. It became so unhealthy that it has an impact on my physical health. I’m not trying to get a diagnosis but just some advices on how to talk to my parents (that know absolutely nothing about it, they just think I’m someone very nervous) even if I know that it would tear them apart to know that I self-harmed and how bad I feel. Or is there a way to make them subtly understand that something’s wrong without directly going to them? Thank you very much for reading this!
You are doing the right thing if you ask for help. It is a mistake to wait. The wait is over if you decide it is. It is time to ask for help.
Be honest with your parents about what’s wrong. They need to know the truth so that they can assist you with finding the right type of treatment. You can also tell them that you have consulted a licensed professional at Psych Central who has recommended the consideration of mental health treatment. Your parents should also know that your symptoms are highly treatable with counseling and medication.
Your parents might feel bad about your having had suffered for years but it will not “tear them apart.” They only want you to be healthy and happy. They will be happy to know that with some intervention you will be once again be the healthy, happy daughter that they want you to be. They love you and won’t like the idea of your suffering now or for the past few years but imagine how much worse it would be for them to know that you would suffer for more years, simply because you were afraid to ask for their help. You have the power to make a positive change in your life right now by asking for help. Utilize your personal power and seek help for your very curable set of problems.
Keeping this information from your parents will only prolong your suffering and ultimately theirs. There is no shame in seeking mental health treatment. Is there shame in seeing your dentist? It is no different.
Once you begin treatment, you will see just how helpful it can be. Good luck and please take care.
Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and Assistant Professor of Social Work and Forensics with extensive experience in the field of mental health. She works in private practice with adults, adolescents and families. Kristina has worked in a large array of settings including community mental health, college counseling and university research centers.
APA Reference Randle, K. (2018). Anxiety Problems But Scared to Tell My Parents. Psych Central.
Retrieved on September 21, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2016/12/15/anxiety-problems-but-scared-to-tell-my-parents/
Last updated: 8 May 2018 Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018 Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.