Since you don’t have a specific question, I will offer you a general answer. It’s difficult to know precisely why you have generated a fake girlfriend, but it could stem from your desire to be seen positively by your friends. You seem to believe that you should have had a girlfriend by this time in your life. You believe that so strongly that you have created a lie to conform to that narrative. If it were because of your loneliness and depression, then you may not have shared the lie with your friends. Your need to share the lie with your friends might indicate that you were attempting to shape the way they saw you.
Stereotypes exist in our culture about how people are supposed to behave. These stereotypes put pressure on people to behave in a particular way. One way to be perceived as a “man,” in our culture, is to date many women and to have many sexual conquests. Some men brag about having had many sexual partners, even if their claims are untrue.
You have a decision to make. Your friends are wondering why they have never met your girlfriend. An easy way out of this dilemma is to say that the two of you broke up. That would immediately end the lie.
You are a great candidate for counseling. It could address your depression and help you to analyze why you feel compelled to lie about a relationship. Depression is a highly treatable disorder. Counseling could help you tremendously. I hope that you will consider it. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle