You said that he stares at young girls and “undresses them with his eyes.” Unless he explicitly states that he is doing so, it is difficult to confirm that he actually is. However, when confronted, he didn’t deny your accusations, but instead offered a rationale to explain his behavior. His offering of a rationale could be considered an admission of his behavior.
His behavior is a problem for many obvious reasons; chief among them is that it likely makes the girls at whom he stares feel very uncomfortable. His interest in them is likely sexual.
It’s a problem for your relationship because even after bringing it to his attention, he continues to do it. He seems to have little regard for your feelings.
Whether he is a pedophile is not something that I could determine on the basis of a short letter. He would need to undergo a psychological evaluation to determine that. Despite not having a definitive answer, there are legitimate reasons to be concerned about his behavior and your relationship.
It is concerning that he asks you to do things that make you feel uncomfortable. You also described him as controlling and jealous. By your own admission, being in a relationship with him makes you unhappy and anxious. If those things are true, then the question becomes: why stay with someone who makes you unhappy and anxious?
Generally speaking, relationships should bring happiness into your life and not be a source of misery. Whether or not you stay with your partner is ultimately your decision. If you’re having difficulty knowing what to do, consult a therapist. Therapy could help you to determine whether you should end the relationship. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle