I know I have OCD, GAD, depression, and an eating disorder and I am on 30mg of prozac which has helped a bit. However, I noticed a few changes in my behavior and im not quite sure what to make of them and i had to stop seeing my therapist, Im seeing a new one soon, but im supposed to discuss gender identity problems so i dont think that is the right place to discuss this. Basically im very paranoid and at first it seemed to all be related to social anxiety like i would convince myself they all hated me and would delete all my social media and hate them for supposedly hating me (for something as silly as not answering a text) but i got in trouble so im fairly isolated now and only have myself to talk to. But when im driving im always looking to see whos behind me and what they might be thinking and if theyre following me and ill go 40 in a 25 just to get away from someone and im overly suspicious something is up and theyre followng me or thinking bad things of me somehow.I also have depersonalization and derealization issues and when it gets bad i convince myself that the reality im trapped in doesnt matter anyways and that i should just focus on the reality i create for myself in my head. Im also more religious lately? Ive always been agnostic but now I love Jesus a lot and bought a crucifix to hang on my wall from a thrift shop which isnt an issue but im just worried because my grandpa and uncle were both schizophrenic and im 17 and these are supposed to be early warning signs but i dont want to jump to conclusions of course. I dont know. I just feel really weird and life seems very strange to me.Paranoid, Don’t Quite Know What’s Wrong with Me?
Paranoid, Don’t Quite Know What’s Wrong with Me?
Being between therapists is likely contributing to your anxiety. You also mentioned that your Prozac has “helped a bit.” “A bit” is small. It would suggest that your symptoms are not well controlled. These two factors are likely contributing to your symptoms.
Another consideration is that the symptoms you referred to as paranoia might actually be symptoms of anxiety. People with anxiety disorders tend to fear extreme, irrational and unlikely outcomes. It is fairly common for people with anxiety disorders to believe that they are developing schizophrenia.
Once you begin therapy, you might find that your symptoms dissipate. It is also possible that you need a medication change. Your medication should be helping you more than “a bit.” Once you begin counseling again and have your medication adjusted, your symptoms might improve.
Having two family members with schizophrenia increases your probability of developing schizophrenia but only slightly. There is a strong genetic component to schizophrenia but environmental and psychosocial factors also play a strong role.
You are still very young. At 17, your brain and identity are still in development. The teenage years are a turbulent time. Carefully monitor and record your symptoms and should you decide to see a therapist, sharing this information would be very helpful. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle