You mentioned having previously consulted a psychologist for these problems. Was he or she a sex therapist? If not, consult a sex therapist. They have specialized training in dealing with sexual health problems. Any other problems would be addressed by a different type of therapist.
I’m wondering if you have been evaluated by a gynecologist for potential medical problems. A gynecologist could rule out any medical problems that could be contributing to your sexual problems.
Your boyfriend might be understandably concerned about your sexual intimacy issues but his name-calling is abusive. You asked whether this relationship can be fixed — Maybe, with counseling, but only if both of you are willing to make the necessary corrections to improve the relationship.
To answer your questions directly, yes, you should consult another therapist. This time, choose a sex therapist. A psychiatrist may not be necessary in this case unless your therapist believes otherwise. I would advise against self-help; your problems seem complicated and would best be addressed by a professional.
If your boyfriend is unwilling to enter counseling or if he continues to engage in abusive behavior, then your relationship might not be salvageable. Your therapist can help you to determine if this relationship can be improved. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle