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Why Do I Escape from Others

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From the U.S.: Why do I escape from others, be it friends or people I am romantically interested in?

As a young child I witnessed DV and drug issues with my mother, etc. Eventually this lead to her abandoning me. Additionally, I experienced physical abuse from my father and later emotional/psychological from romantic relationships.

I seem to try and escape from everything, friends, people I am interested in romantically, and it’s causing troubles. I don’t want to hurt others, but I am trying to understand why I do this and how I can explain to others when they ask me “Why are you escaping from me.” I want to understand and to help others understand, so why do I do this?

Why Do I Escape from Others

Answered by on -


It’s possible that as a child who went through so much, you drew the conclusion that you can’t really trust anyone. To keep yourself safe, you keep your distance. If someone gets close, you reject them before they can hurt you. You aren’t doing this on purpose. It’s an automatic response that is often the outcome of abandonment and abuse.

I suggest you find a counselor to explore this further. You deserve to have the support you need to recover the ability to trust and be close to the people you care about.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

Why Do I Escape from Others

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). Why Do I Escape from Others. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 20, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.