When I was in the 8th grade around age 13-14, I was diagnosed with psychotic depression. Symptoms included hearing voices (inside my head, not outside), occasional visual hallucinations, self-injury and suicidal ideation. Each voice had a name and their own personality, and not all of the voices were negative. They interacted with each other and also with me. I was put on a high dose of risperidone and symptoms began to decrease, and I stopped seeing a psychiatrist. I am now 17 years old, and recently, I’ve been having inner dialogue going on between my own consciousness and two voices that are not created consciously by me. I am female and they are both male. One is the same age as me and one is around 19 or 20 and they both have their own names and personalities, similar to what I experienced when I was younger. Now, however, I’m noticing that I’m becoming more and more forgetful of what I’ve done and sometimes what I’m in the process of doing. For instance I’ve received classwork and exams handed back to me with my name on it that are written in different handwriting that I don’t remember doing. My friends will ask me if I remember something we talked about yesterday or even earlier the same day and I won’t recall what they’re talking about. Sometimes I’ll be in the middle of doing something and I suddenly forget what I was doing and have to ask my friend what I was just talking about. However, at times, one of the voices will say “Oh yeah I remember that!” or they’ll say “we were in the middle of doing this,” most of the time being correct. I’m concerned and confused about what’s been going on. I’m not sure if I’m having another psychotic episode and I’m delusional or if I might have signs of DID. I know I should go back to my psychiatrist either way, but what do you think this could be?
Thank you for your time.Unsure if I’m Experiencing Symptoms of DID or if Psychosis Is Returning
Unsure if I’m Experiencing Symptoms of DID or if Psychosis Is Returning
Without interviewing you in person, it’s difficult to know if you are experiencing psychosis or symptoms of dissociative identity disorder (DID) or both. In some ways, psychosis and symptoms of DID are similar. For instance, it is common for people with psychosis to not remember certain events or behavior. Persons with DID have similar experiences because, in theory, the other personalities take over and engage in activities that the “host” personality did not do, or at least doesn’t remember doing.
It would be wise to return to your psychiatrist. He or she would be in the best position to help you know what’s wrong. Sometimes, pinpointing the exact cause of symptoms can be difficult. If medication can reduce or eliminate your symptoms, that would be a successful outcome. If you no longer heard voices, perhaps this problem would be solved. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle