I despise my friends and family. I despise my school; thought I have good grades, which I believe are pointless. I despise society and its expectations. I despise structured and organized environments. I feel misanthropic in a way.
I want to take a knife and slit the throat of my family members and friends. I want to pour cyanide into their drinks at dinner and burn them in acid. I want to take an AK-47 and grenades and cause havoc at my school. I dont do it thought, since I dont want to go to prison.
I do not feel powerless, nor depressed. I am no outcast. I have no anxiety. I can feel emotions, and I can relate to them and I hate it.I Want to Murder
I Want to Murder
The teenage years are immensely difficult. People underestimate just how difficult it is to go from being a child to being an adult. It’s difficult for most people. It seems to be difficult for you.
The cause of your feelings may not be evident to you, but it should be evident that something is wrong. It’s not normal to hate people. It’s also not normal to want to kill them and to be contemplating their demise. Something is causing you to feel the way you do.
At 14, there are many things that you don’t understand. As you develop and mature, things that were once perplexing will likely become much clearer to you. In the meantime, counseling could help you understand what might be wrong and how to fix it. It could help you explore, uncover, and discover why you hate people and want to hurt them. Most importantly, it can help you overcome this problem and live a more contented life. Happy people do not fantasize about killing people.
You don’t need to know what’s wrong in order to seek help. The therapist will help you determine what’s wrong. Therapists have undergone years of rigorous training to understand why people develop a negative view of the world. Ask your parents for their assistance in seeking professional help. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle