You’re not overreacting. Your instincts about needing help are correct. You could greatly benefit from counseling to deal with your strong emotions.
What might be happening is that as your anxiety level increases, you are inappropriately expressing your strong emotions. In other words, your desire to hurt people, animals and yourself might be the outward expression of your inability to handle strong emotions.
Some people overeat when they are emotional. Some others drink alcohol, use illegal drugs or go on spending sprees. Your (maladaptive) strategy for handling strong emotions seems to be hurting yourself or wanting to hurt other people or animals.
Those are unhealthy responses to strong emotions, which result in self-mutilation or your possibly hurting someone else. You need to learn healthy strategies for handling strong emotions. Therapy is the ideal place to learn these skills. Other strategies might involve group therapy, journaling, exercise, meditation, among others.
It was good that you asked for help. It was the right thing to do and now that you know that professional help would benefit you, ask your parents for their assistance. If that strategy doesn’t work, then speak to your school guidance counselor. He or she might be able to assist you or speak to your parents for you. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle