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Anger Causing Problems in My Relationship

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Hi, I am a person that gets angry very quickly, and my mind doesn’t give me a second to try and breath or count to ten or to simply walk away from the problem, I start to argue and I’m ready to fight. It’s causing a problem in my relationship, and I’ve tried exercises to see signs of when I’m going to get upset, or to avoid a situation where I know I will get mad, but I’m still having a hard time with it. My boyfriend/fiancé is a really great guy and tries to help but I feel guilty because when I get upset I lash out at anybody standing near me, and once my anger has passed then I’m apologizing, but it’s getting to the point where I’m getting upset and can’t stop myself, to when I’m done arguing and see my actions I walk away and do a complete 180 in my emotion, and I’m not sure what to do now. I am an unemployed woman who doesn’t want to work and I have had two miscarriages that I have overcome, but I’m not sure what to do here, since it’s getting worse.

Anger Causing Problems in My Relationship

Answered by on -


It takes a great deal of courage to face this issue and I admire you for this. The way you describe this leads me to think a complete and thorough medical exam is the best place to start. Explain your symptoms and let the physician get all the information needed about your physical well-being. Start there and, if there are no causes there, find a therapist who can help you unravel this and get to the cause.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Anger Causing Problems in My Relationship

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Anger Causing Problems in My Relationship. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 21, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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