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STD Test Came Back Positive but Boyfriend Says He’s Been Faithful

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From an 18 year old in the U.S.: I have been worrying about my boyfriend possibly cheating on me since we first starting going out. I have no reason not to trust him and he is truly the sweetest man I know. I was previously in an abusive relationship with a man who always accused me of being unfaithful. I am aware how frustrating this is. I try my hardest not to ask him if he’s cheating all the time and it’s gotten better until yesterday.

I got a call from my gyno saying that Chlamydia was detected in my routine test. I immediately called him and accused him of cheating. He insists that isn’t the case. I have never not used a condom and have only had sex with virgins except one man. This guy was not a virgin but we did use a condom and I did not perform oral sex on him. I’m having a really hard time believing I couldve gotten an STD from him and cant stop accusing my current boyfriend. Please help.

STD Test Came Back Positive but Boyfriend Says He’s Been Faithful

Answered by on -

A.

Please slow down. Don’t continue accusing your boyfriend until you’ve had a retest. These tests aren’t 100% reliable. It’s possible your test results are a “false positive.”

Secondly: You didn’t mention how long you’ve been with your current boyfriend or how long ago you had sex with the more experienced guy. Chlamydia is known as a “silent” disease because people are often not symptomatic. It’s possible you were infected some time ago. Talk to your OB/GYN about the course of the disease and what to do about it.

I’m glad you are working on being more trusting. As you know from experience, being undeservedly distrusted ruins a relationship. In order to have a healthy relationship, both people in a couple need to trust and be trust-worthy. Trust is the most profound gift people can give each other. That’s why it is so painful when trust is broken.

Please gather facts before making conclusions. Your boyfriend deserves the benefit of the doubt. If he is, in fact, “innocent” it’s an important lesson learned in the importance of not jumping to conclusions.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

STD Test Came Back Positive but Boyfriend Says He’s Been Faithful

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). STD Test Came Back Positive but Boyfriend Says He’s Been Faithful. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 22, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2015/12/10/std-test-came-back-positive-but-boyfriend-says-hes-been-faithful/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.