We can’t make a diagnosis on the basis of only a letter, of course. However, I think what you are reporting is serious and deserves attention.
I don’t know what you told the psychiatrist and I can’t comment on what she said. It may be that you weren’t clear. It may be that she didn’t see the level of your distress.
I strongly urge you to give treatment another try. The success of therapy often depends on the “fit” of the counselor and the client. Not everyone is a match. I do suggest that you start with a psychologist, social worker or mental health counselor who works collaboratively with a psychiatrist. You may or may not benefit from medication. It might be helpful to first talk things out with a trained therapist before pursuing drugs as the answer.
You’ve written a thoughtful letter about how you feel as well as about what is going on at home. Please take your letter and this response with you to the first appointment. It will give the counselor a good outline of the issues. If you don’t think you are understood, speak up. The only thing a counselor has to work with is what he or she is told.
After the first or second session, it is usual for the therapist to share impressions and to make recommendations. It’s important that you collaborate fully. You are an essential member of your own treatment team.
If you still don’t feel understood, please don’t give up. Sometimes it takes a few interviews before someone finds the clinician that he or she can trust. That’s normal and appropriate. After all, you will be talking about the most important things in your life.
I wish you well.