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Stuck within Self

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I am 23 year old and I was sexually abused by my brother when I was 6 years old. I only have fragments of memories of being abused as a kid. My brother pretended it never happened and never touched me again. I grew up being in confused state whether or not I was abused. From childhood, I lacked self control for example I was eating continuously, watching T.V. continuously for 8 to 10 hours, neglecting my health. I was messed up and never told anyone about this. Right now I have cut off all my contact with my brother and my condition is getting worse after I realized and accepted I was sexually abused. My daily activities has been severely hampered and I can’t seem to take control of my life, I feel like I am possessed and control by someone else when I am staying alone. I procrastinate a lot and knowingly hurt myself which i don’t like. I tried therapy and it didn’t work out my condition. I don’t know what to do as I feel lost. (age 23, from India)

Stuck within Self

Answered by on -


I’m sorry that you are suffering in this way and I’d like to offer you hope. Accepting what happened to you is the first step and it takes a lot of courage. You have already done that so you are well on your way to healing, however, healing from something like this may be more than you can do alone. I know that you have tried therapy and feel that it didn’t help, but I would ask that you try again. Sometimes it is about timing, sometimes it is about finding the right match with a therapist, but therapy can be very helpful in learning how to heal and move on from the past.

I would also suggest that you do some reading on the effects of sexual abuse and consider joining support group. Speaking with others who have gone through similar things can also be very helpful. Please don’t take your pain out on yourself, you have been hurt enough. Commit to finding healthy coping skills so that you can take control of your life again. It will get better.

All the best,

Dr. Holly Counts

Stuck within Self

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). Stuck within Self. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 2, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018 (Originally: 2 Sep 2015)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.