I would need more information about your relationship to know why this problem has developed. Did something change? Did you meet someone else? Do you not feel the same way about him anymore? Did he do something to change the way you feel about him? Those are just some of the questions that could help me determine what might be wrong.
One thing is for certain, if you don’t change the way you behave, you risk losing the relationship. Giving him the “cold shoulder,” staying quiet and withholding affection are all emotional abuse tactics. If you fail to communicate your feelings and continue the abuse, you can’t expect him to want to stay in this relationship for much longer. Abuse of any kind is intolerable.
People tend to abuse those closest to them, the people they love. Everyone makes mistakes and mistakes can be forgiven, but repeated acts of mistreatment constitute a pattern. We must always try to treat people kindly and fairly and not abuse them in any way. Treat him how you would want to be treated.
If you’d like to explore your irritability and the reason for it in more depth, consider counseling but in the meantime, make a concerted effort to treat him kindly even when you are upset. Continuing your behavior could ultimately mean the end of your relationship. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle