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Boyfriend a Serial Cheater

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Yesterday I found out my boyfriend cheated on me. He was very honest about what he had done. He shows me his phone and in this private message area there were 10+ women he were talking to and having affairs with. He told me he is a serial cheater, and he does not know why he does it. I believe it is triggered some kind of way. The reason why I say this is because he thought i was cheating which made him go out and do what he did. I was wondering can he change?, how can i help him?,is this a psychological issue. I just really need some advice on this. please help. (age 21, from US)

Boyfriend a Serial Cheater

Answered by on -


Yes, people can change, but only if they want to and put effort towards it.  You sending a very strong message that his behavior is unacceptable and that it has consequences might be the catalyst for his desire to change, but I hope that you are smart enough to be long gone by then.

In a situation like this when he has become a “serial cheater,” it doesn’t matter why he cheated as much as that he did and he just kept doing it. Trust has been broken. Move on and find someone who respects you and who is willing to commit.

All the best,

Dr. Holly Counts

Boyfriend a Serial Cheater

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). Boyfriend a Serial Cheater. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 21, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.