My parents got separated 10 years ago and my mother brought up me and my little brother single handed. My father was not concerned about us and he is dead now. But when I was growing up, I felt the terrible need of my father. I still feel unprotected and unsafe. I feel like none will come to save me if i am in danger. Maybe it is because I have faced several sexual abuses in my teenage life which insisted me to think that if my dad was with me then it wouldn’t be like this. I have a boyfriend who sometimes supports me emotionally but not otherwise. What should I do to solve this problem? I am broken inside, I just want some care, respect and protection right now. Should I expect it from others or just do it myself as always? How can i get out of this depression and feeling of insecurity?Depressed Because of Not Having Anyone Who Will Support Me Financially or Physically
Depressed Because of Not Having Anyone Who Will Support Me Financially or Physically
You’re probably right that you feel the way you do because of your sexual abuse history. Sexual abuse can lead to posttraumatic stress which can cause you to feel anxious and unsafe.
Your uncertainty about financial and physical stability may stem from having been raised by a single parent. Financially, it’s much more difficult when there’s only one parent. The breakup of the family can be quite traumatic, especially for children.
You should not expect that other people will take care of you. If that is your expectation, then your happiness would be dependent upon others and that is not a desirable outcome. One should always strive to be independent and the creator of their own happiness.
Your problems are correctable with therapy. Therapy will teach you how to be more independent and self-sustaining. You can’t change your past, but you can change your future. You can begin this process by first gaining an education and then getting a job and supporting yourself. The more you accomplish in life, the more confident you will feel about yourself and your abilities. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle