You are correct to think that it’s not okay that he yells at you the way he does. Not only is it disrespectful, but it sounds like it is bordering on verbal abuse. He might find it genuinely frustrating if he is expressing concerns about something and you don’t respond. This pattern can tend to escalate the other person, but it’s not an excuse for yelling and cursing. You have a right to feel safe in your own home.
If he is unwilling to address the problem on his own, he might be willing to attend couple’s therapy with you. However, if he isn’t even willing to do that, then it’s time for you to leave. Sometimes a separation can shock the other person into corrective action, but again, if he is unwilling to change and just puts all the blame on you, you are better off just breaking it off now. Break ups are hard but not as hard as being in an unhappy long term relationship.
All the best
Dr. Holly Counts