I’m under a tremendous amount of stress from all angles — money, job and family. I am a middle-aged single, white, female and have remained close to my dysfunctional family back home.
I’m having trouble reconciling an old, old wound — the divorce of my parents. It seems OK until something comes up and then my dad, who is basically a good man but was a neglectful father, seems to be trying to pull me closer, but it’s hard since I don’t really like his wife, her kids or the ultra conservative form of Christianity they have gotten into since my childhood. When this happens, I have a hard time not being angry.
My mother — I love her dearly but she doesn’t really understand me emotionally, and she has a few health problems. (Though my dad is actually in worse health.)
I am a church-goer and have a wide circle of friends. But, I don’t have any constants in my life to support me emotionally, that is on a daily basis. At this point in my life, it seems I have few people around me I can really just relax and “let my hair down” with, so to speak.
I feel like screaming, and don’t seem to cry anymore. I don’t exactly feel numb, I just feel exhausted.
I know a lot of this is simple stress, but what else can I do to keep myself from letting the world get to me? There just seems to be little joy or comfort to be had for me these days.Stressed Out from Everything
Stressed Out from Everything
I’m very sorry that you don’t have the family they you want or deserve. But family is a way of feeling, not just biology. You say you have a wide circle of close friends. They are your chosen family and can probably give you the emotional support you need if you let them. Please let them. That is probably the best antidote for stress there is.
It might also help you manage those difficult feelings if you learned some kind of meditation. Being fully present for even 20 minutes a day helps many people de-stress and relax. There are guided meditations on YouTube that you might find helpful. Also take a look at Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). He’s been researching the positive effects of meditation for some 30 years.
I wish you well.