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Strong Feelings for an Old Friend

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From the U.K: What do you do when you realize you’ve had feelings for someone when you didn’t notice the feelings, the girl I cut out of my life 3 years ago, because I felt like I was losing her to other people. I had met her on a night out just last week, unplanned and we spoke the whole evening as if it was old times and everything was forgotten, but on my way home I had then realized what I feel for her, and that it had been like that from the moment I met her but just had never realized it. What do I do? I am very confused and my head is all over the place, I don’t want to tell her because it might scare her off, but on the other hand I want to pour my heart out to her.

Strong Feelings for an Old Friend

Answered by on -


Slow down. It’s wonderful that you’ve realized how strongly you feel for this person. But the fact is, you barely know her. I suggest that you take your time and find ways to get together with her that are low key and casual. If a friendship develops, you have a much better chance to move on to love. You were only 15 when you met her. You may actually have different wants and needs in a love relationship now. You won’t know if she is really for you until you know her in the present, not just remember her from the past.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

Strong Feelings for an Old Friend

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). Strong Feelings for an Old Friend. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 19, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.