I cannot give an official diagnosis over the Internet, and without doing an assessment, but you are certainly describing traits that are included in the criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. However, most of us hesitate to truly diagnose personality disorders in adolescents because you are still developing your personality. Which is even more reason you should work on changing some of these extreme tendencies while you are young enough to do so. I hope you are working with a therapist, and if not, please consider finding one that you like.
There are lots of ways to cope with feelings other than harming yourself and you need to learn that feeling “upset” should not be your preferred state. I’m sorry that you are still hearing about your parents’ divorce but even that is something that you can heal from and move beyond. On one hand, adolescence is a time when you can try on many different hats in discovering yourself, but it is also a time to begin thinking about your future and who you want to become. Work on becoming a person you can be proud of.
All the best,
Dr. Holly Counts