There’s a saying: Don’t go to the hardware store to buy a loaf of bread. Your intuition is right about this being something to deal with now. Don’t work so hard to get something from your mother that isnt part of her nature. It may be that she doesn’t quite grasp your talents or the nature of your career. She might not know how to give praise. In any case, at this stage of your life, you shouldn’t invest much time in teaching, training, and hoping for her to get this. You also have the experience of seeing her turn the tables when you were direct. It isn’t there for her to give.
By limiting your expectations of your mother you may be able to have a more pleasant time, and in fact, a better relationship. Try to accept her for who she is rather then invest your time and patience in trying to rebuild her. Do for her what you wished she could have done for you. This should give you a better way to join her in those areas you can connect on.