It’s your opinion that your parents should respect you and call you by the name you want. It’s their opinion that you should use your husband’s last name. Which of you is correct? There is no correct answer. It’s a matter of opinion, apparently differing opinions.
Perhaps your parents and siblings see it as disrespectful for you to not use your husband’s last name. Their reasons may lie with tradition or even could be tied to their religious beliefs. You see it differently.
Neither of you deserve more respect than the other. You want them to respect your “rights.” They want you to respect their “rights.” Ultimately, you would like them to show respect and tolerance for your feelings. They do not. They call you by whatever name they have chosen. They believe that a woman should be called by her husband’s last name. You believe otherwise. Neither of you respect the other’s position. And so the fight continues.
The misery can continue forever or it can end now by simply believing that they have the right to their opinion, as horribly wrong as you believe it to be.
Good luck. Choose, wisely.
Dr. Kristina Randle