I have almost always been quite emotionally flat, in particular I am difficult at expressing love and I neither can I seem to get angry.
Although over the past year and a half I have become more reclusive, and have began to develop a level of paranoia, for instance if I hear nearby people laughing I’ll assume it’s about me. I have also been seeing things and hearing voice on a far more regular basis.
My emotions can change randomly at times, and I get anxious about having to explain things as I tend to mess it up.
These as I am aware are all signs of the condition, however what really made me suspicious was one night I feel as though I completely lost my mind, I became paranoid and had an irrational fear that someone wanted to kill me because I knew their secrets.
I felt truly terrified and it caused me to cry uncontrollably, I seriously thought I was going to die, I tend to laugh about it now.
Could this be Schizophrenia? I really hope you can advise me as I want to go to the doctor but I am a little nervous.
Thanks in advance.I Think I Might Be Developing Early Schizophrenia
I Think I Might Be Developing Early Schizophrenia
Your symptoms may or may not be indicative of schizophrenia. You described not feeling anger. Anger might be a common human emotion, but it’s not necessarily a healthy one. Some people rarely feel anger. That doesn’t make them emotionally flat; it makes them emotionally stable.
You also mentioned your difficulty with expressing love. Perhaps it’s because you’re shy or because you haven’t met someone whom you feel is worthy of your love. That’s just one explanation and there may be others.
Your reclusiveness is a concern, but how are you defining reclusiveness? Your definition of reclusiveness may be different than mine.
You also described feeling paranoid. The episode you described is unusual and warrants an evaluation.
You may or may not have schizophrenia. Your symptoms warrant a closer look. It’s impossible to provide a diagnosis over the Internet. It’s good that you are planning to be evaluated. The evaluator can gather a thorough psychosocial history and determine if you have a mental illness. The evaluator will also likely make a recommendation for treatment, if they feel it is warranted. I wish you the best of luck. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle