I sometimes get really weird thoughts in my head which can be about family members or friends, both still a little disturbing at times and they come out of no where I’ll be thinking about something completely different and then a really weird thought will come into my head, it’s easy to not think about it but I can’t help it.
I also get adrenaline rushes sometimes. I’ll be thinking about something in my head and the adrenaline will just build up then it’s kinda like I come back to reality and adrenaline is just gone. These thoughts can be from me being like superman to me beating someone up (which I don’t understand as I’m a peaceful person).
I also find it very hard to retain information this has been going on for a year or so since I started doing my proper exams. My mind often goes blank aswell , more often then other people for instance, I could get asked a question and I just won’t be able to remember the answer even though I know it I suppose this kinda started as I hit puberty ,maybe it’s to do with my hormones I don’t know but it often happens. I used to be quite smart as well , still smart but not how I used to be as I can’t remember as much as what I used to be able to.
My body is a really big thing to me as well, my family say that I’m not that fat but there my family… I was diagnosed with gynecomastia , the doctor said it was Normal around my age (16)he said that there was nothing that could be done and it was just puberty. I cried on the way back from the doctors as I was by myself ,not because I had gynecomastia but because nothing could be done about it and that I was ‘normal’. I’m really self-conscious about my body and especially as around my age I want to be with girls ect. my friends have never said anything about my weight or even noticed I have a problem but I think I do.
I know this is a diary of all my problems but psychological it’s having a really big effect on me and gets to me more and more each day. Please help me. (From England)