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I Need to Tell My Mom that I Cut Myself Again

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So my mom knows I suffer from suicidal thoughts, have attempted suicide, depression, anxiety, bulimia and cutting. I go to outpatient therapy 2 times a week every week. I was about 2 months clean, but me and my mom recently got in a huge argument … I cut so bad. Worse and more than I’ve ever done. I need to tell my mom and my therapist, but I’m so afraid and I don’t even know how to start the conversation. please please please help me. (age 14, from US)

I Need to Tell My Mom that I Cut Myself Again

Answered by on -


A: Thank you for writing in with your question. I’m hoping that by the time you read my response you will have already figured out how to tell your mom and your therapist about this latest cutting episode. But if you haven’t, I hope my suggestions might help.

I think the first thing to do is to take some pressure off yourself regarding this “confession.” It may be more helpful for you to think of the cutting episode as just one piece of a large puzzle, rather than an isolated event, and also give yourself credit for all the days you haven’t harmed yourself. If you are afraid your mom will be upset, it might be best to tell your therapist first and ask her to help you tell your mom in a session. Your therapist is there to help you, not judge you. Let her know how much you want to get better and to learn other techniques to handle your stress. You might benefit from reading some self-help books for new ideas and coping strategies. There are lots out there but here is one to start with: Stopping the Pain: A Workbook for Teens Who Cut and Self Injure.

Finally, remember that your mom loves you and wants you to get better. It is very difficult for parents to know that their child is hurting and sometimes their concern can come across as anger or some other emotion. Talk to your mom about your feelings and be willing to listen to hers. It will make for a stronger bond and a deeper trust. 

With time and work, you can get through these difficult issues and feel better.  Please don’t give up on yourself. 

All the best,

Dr. Holly Counts

I Need to Tell My Mom that I Cut Myself Again

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). I Need to Tell My Mom that I Cut Myself Again. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 28, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018 (Originally: 12 Jan 2015)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.