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How Do I Recover from a Miscarriage?

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I am 22 years old with 2 kids. I recently had a miscarriage. I was 12 weeks pregnant. I feel stuck I don’t know what to do, I can’t get out of this feeling. All I want is my baby back. I try to get over what happened but I can’t. It’s all I think about. I have no one to talk to about it, the dad doesn’t know what to say to me, he says. I need help overcoming this. It is ruining me, please help!!

How Do I Recover from a Miscarriage?

Answered by on -


I’m so sorry for your loss. Sadly, our culture doesn’t have rituals to help parents grieve a miscarriage. As a result, many people like yourself feel very alone in their sadness.

A loss in pregnancy is very much a loss. At 12 weeks, you may have even felt the first whisper movements. You have not only lost that baby but you’ve lost all the dreams and fantasies you had about who he or she would be and how the addition of this child would change your family.

It might help you get some closure if you and the father created a ritual together to honor the loss and to let that little spirit go.

There are some books that can both validate your grief and help you think about what you want to do. Miscarriage: Women Sharing from the Heart by Marie Allen and Silent Grief: Miscarriage-Child Loss: Finding Your Way Through the Darkness by Clara Hinton are both good resources.

I wish you well during this sad time.
Dr. Marie

How Do I Recover from a Miscarriage?

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). How Do I Recover from a Miscarriage?. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 24, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.