I appreciate the dynamics of your relationship, and I think the emphasis has to be on long term. Both of you have just come through an extremely difficult time in your life. This isn’t about making it right in the short run with the relationship, this is about getting your life on track. What I would recommend is that you take a much longer view of the relationship and your mental health. Think of it as the difference between a sprint and a marathon. If you know something is only going to last a very short time you can put a lot of energy into it. But if you are thinking it’s going to be for a long time you have to approach it differently and pace yourself.
The goal here is for the two of you to remain healthy and to make your personal well-being the priority. Believe it or not the relationship has to be second to your well-being right now. If you’re not good, and he’s not good, nothing will work in the long run.
I put the emphasis on taking very good care of yourself first and foremost and let the relationship evolves over time. Don’t push the river.