A: To be very direct, I think your relationship is doomed. Trust forms the foundation of intimate relationships and you and your boyfriend have never established it in the first place. You can’t get something back that you have never had. I would suggest that you cut your losses, learn from your mistakes and move on.
It is complicated by the fact that you live and work together, but not nearly as complicated as it would be if you were married, had children, owned a home together, etc. In my opinion it will be much easier to find alternative living arrangements and navigate boundaries of a professional relationship than it will be to heal from the damage that has already been done to your personal relationship. You may even discover that you no longer wish to work together and that may be a necessary sacrifice for your freedom.
If you can’t bring yourself to just break it off, I’d say finding a couple’s therapist is a must.
All the best,
Dr. Holly Counts