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Ex-Boyfriend Issue

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I had a boyfriend from July 3013 to September 2013, I broke up with him because I heard rumors that he was cheating so I didn’t know what else to do & of course he denied the rumors but the rumors came from very close friends although they had no proof. He now has a girlfriend. About a month ago I met up with him & we hung out & also made out even though I knew I shouldn’t have but I really miss him a lot, idk if I’d call it love but I have really deep feelings for him considering he took my virginity & was my first boyfriend. He tells me he loves me & misses me k misses us but he’s still with his girlfriend. Idk what to do. Idk if I should leave him alone. But I really really want him back but I don’t see him leaving his girlfriend and I can’t stop thinking about him, I can’t move on he’s the only guy I have ever felt comfortable with & I’ve never been nervous around him.

Ex-Boyfriend Issue

Answered by on -

A.

Think about this: If he’s cheating on his girlfriend with you it means his capacity to make a commitment is not strong. If he is cheating on her with you — why wouldn’t he eventually be cheating on you with someone else?

Don’t set yourself up. If you want to be in a committed relationship with him tell him you don’t want to be with him while he’s still in a relationship with his girlfriend. Unless he is willing to do this you, are putting yourself in a very vulnerable and risky position.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Ex-Boyfriend Issue

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Ex-Boyfriend Issue. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 22, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/06/07/ex-boyfriend-issue/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.