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Boyfriend Wont Stop Lying

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So there are these 2 girls who my boyfriend always talks to and they have always cause troubles in our relationship. I’ve always approached him and asked him why he’s lied to me about not talking to them anymore when it’s right there on his phone. He doesn’t say anything apart from ‘sorry’ and that he’s not going to bother about talking to them again. To which I reply ‘thank you, you know what they’ve done to us before.’ Then a day later he’s talking to them again. I’m not quite sure what to do about it because it has happened more times that I care to say. It’s very upsetting. What should I do?

Boyfriend Wont Stop Lying

Answered by on -

A.

Thank you for sending us you’re letter. Let me offer my perspective on what I am hearing you say: You have a boyfriend that you’ve explained your needs to — and he agrees to stop because it is hurtful to you. Then lies to you and does it again. If he can’t be sensitive to you with this relatively small request, how can you trust him with the more important things that are in a relationship? How can you build a bond that’s based on your partner not honoring you?

I think I would try once more to explain that this is a deal-breaker. Let him know this is important, serious and this is his last opportunity. If he understands this — great. If not, don’t waste your time with someone who doesn’t care enough about how you feel.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Boyfriend Wont Stop Lying

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Boyfriend Wont Stop Lying. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 19, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/05/16/boyfriend-wont-stop-lying/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.