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Having Issues with Confidence and Security with Myself

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I’m a 23 year old and I’m currently suffering from depression, social anxiety, low-self esteem, low confidence, and I’ve been smoking marijuana. To be stated, I’m currently away from home and attending university. In the past i have also been concerned with what other think about me, and strived to be adored by others. I have constantly tried to seek the attention of others through complaining about my life, (which in true reality there is nothing wrong). Anyways it was not till leaving my home to attend school far from my house that I have experienced huge depression issues, thoughts of suicide as well, truly seeking sympathy from other to console my own issues. I’m seeking advice as well as help or methods to which I can overcome these issues in my life, so I continue down my path and being able to handle life without being overwhelmed with these issues.

Having Issues with Confidence and Security with Myself

Answered by on -


A: Unfortunately, it sounds like your past methods of seeking attention have caught up with you and now you are truly experiencing some of the things you pretended to have before, a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. Leaving the home you know and the support system you have always had to move away and attend school is a major life change and can lead to feelings of sadness and insecurity. Many times these negative feelings are temporary and can be accounted for by the changes and transitions you are going through. However, if you don’t adjust soon you could develop clinical depression (if you haven’t already) and professional treatment is warranted.

What have you actively done to adjust to your new surroundings? Have you tried to create a new support system? Have you tried getting involved in clubs or activities at your college? Have you spoken with the campus counseling center? These are all things I would recommend for you. I would also recommend backing off the marijuana to see if this improves your mood and adjustment.  The only way to know how you really feel is to let yourself have the genuine feelings rather than trying to self-medicate them away.  You will then be better equipped to develop a plan of action.

Most universities have excellent counseling centers right on campus, and if not, they will be able to link you with resources in the community.  Please get help soon before your symptoms get worse.

All the best,

Dr. Holly Counts

Having Issues with Confidence and Security with Myself

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). Having Issues with Confidence and Security with Myself. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 23, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018 (Originally: 27 Apr 2014)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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