Thank you for allowing me to answer your concerns. What seems clear from your description is that you’re creating the problem. This often happens when there it’s a struggle to be in an intimate relationship. You may want to ask yourself why do you keep blowing it up? By your own words you say you were picking a fight, causing a riff, and forcing him to shut down.
My suggestion is to enter into individual therapy to find out why you’re pushing him away. You’re saying, other than the problems you were generating, he’s a good man. Divorcing him without looking at the source of the conflict within yourself would only likely allow the issue to occur again in the next relationship.
I find out what’s causing you to alienate your husband.