It’s important that you deal with these trust and anxiety issues because they are negatively impacting your relationship. Your boyfriend has tolerated it for some time, but eventually he will grow tired of false accusations and may end the relationship. Thus, if you want to remain in this relationship, you must deal with these issues.
Per your letter, your boyfriend has “never done anything to even indicate” that he would cheat on you. If that is true, then you must believe it and behave accordingly. You should try to believe in the truth. If you allow yourself to believe in things that are not true, then your anxiety will continue. Always search for objective proof and do not allow yourself to believe in ideas that have no basis in reality.
Fundamentally, anxiety stems from not believing in reality. There’s no evidence to show that your boyfriend is cheating. In that case, don’t give those fears life by continuing to believe that they may be true.
Challenging irrational beliefs and forcing yourself to believe in reality, is ultimately how one overcomes anxiety. Understandably, that is not an easy task. It can take a great deal of effort to retrain your mind to think in this new, objective way. That is why I would highly recommend that you seek psychological help. Therapy could assist you in developing the skills to manage your anxiety. If you want to have a healthy relationship, then it is immensely important that you correct these issues. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle