I am very glad you are asking for help with this. You are doing the right thing to ensure your well-being and your family. I have included this link to a well-respected facility in your state that can either provide services or make a more localized referral for counseling at reduced or no fees nearby. You may also want to look at the find help tab at the top of this page for therapists near you who could tell you about the local women’s center or other places for low-cost or free counseling.
Again, it is important that you continue to follow up on your desire to make things better.