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Hatred for Stepson

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I have a three year old step son who really gets under my skin the way he talks the way he looks the way he eats just him being around angers me to the point I feel hatred for him I don’t know why I feel this way and don’t know how to make it go away and I cannot just divorce my wife because we have one year old together and I feel exactly 100% opposite about him as I do the step son. I’ve not been abusive I don’t hit neither one of the kids I’m afraid to spank the step son because I’m afraid ill hurt I don’t discipline him in any way I pretty much don’t do anything with him I feel like he is the third wheel in our family and I often wish he was not around at all because my hate for him is ripping me and my wife apart what can I do.

Hatred for Stepson

Answered by on -


Thank you for asking about this. I would strongly encourage you to see a family counselor who is proficient in working with blended families. My guess is there is more to your reaction than just the child and having a trained person help you sort through it would be the best way to go forward.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Hatred for Stepson

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Hatred for Stepson. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 23, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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