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Depression and Self-Harm

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I’m 16 years old and for about three years now I have been really depressed. I have self-harmed quite a bit, and now have a lot of trouble sleeping. I am constantly arguing with my family, and have real problems when it comes to friendships. I like to keep myself to myself, and mostly because I have been bullied for the past five years of my life. I feel really isolated and secluded from anybody, and am constantly finding it hard to cope with minimal friendships. I find it terribly difficult to talk to anybody about how I feel because I hate to have attention. I am just trying so hard to cope, but nearly every day I break down. No one knows, because I keep myself to myself. I have a lot of trouble showing my emotions and people see me as a careless, selfish person. I really don’t think I am a good person, however I know it’s all in my head. I hate talking about myself because I do not want anyone to guess what is wrong with me, although I really want to tell someone. I constantly feel hopeless and even more helpless, ever on the brink of self-harming. I seem to have no control over my emotions, and can explode at anyone, although it seems to always be a family member. I just feel no one understands me and I really want to know how to deal with my problem. I hate living with these feelings, but I can’t help myself. I do sometimes just want to die, and I honestly believe that no one will care, as I have next to no friends and I feel that my family doesn’t like me. I am really scared that I will do something that will take a turn for the worse.

Depression and Self-Harm

Answered by on -


Since it has often been your family that you have lashed out to, perhaps you can enlist their help in making an appointment with a therapist. My guess is if you explain that you know you need to change and want some help in making that happen, then they will be able to help.

I would certainly seek this help sooner rather than later. You did the right thing by reaching out here — now take the next step and ask for help from your family. If they are not able, bring your concerns to your school counselor or a trusted teacher. They should be able to get you on the right path.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Depression and Self-Harm

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Depression and Self-Harm. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 5, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018 (Originally: 5 Sep 2013)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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