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Can’t Get Over Child’s Father

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Me and my ex were together on and off for almost 7 years, we have a child together now. We broke up a little over a year ago and he hasn’t had any contact with our child but a handful of times. He randomly calls and wants to be in our Childs life and tells me he loves me and wants his family back but goes back to the girl he has been on and off with the past year, her kids call him dad and he acts like our child doesn’t exist. Why does he randomly make contact with us saying he wants us back just to ignore us in the end? What do I do to get over him?

Can’t Get Over Child’s Father

Answered by on -


Sometimes there is an overlap between legal and psychological approaches. I think your situation is one where you may want to consult a lawyer about the father’s obligation from a legal perspective. This typically includes financial responsibilities, and visitation and child care responsibilities. Your letter didn’t mention these things, but they somehow seem important and it is unclear if he has taken on these responsibilities.

I would also contact the local women’s center in your area and ask about both psychological and legal support for this important concern.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Can’t Get Over Child’s Father

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Can’t Get Over Child’s Father. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 24, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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