Intellectually, your reaction to bullying is understandable but not right. Perhaps you resorted to violence because you felt helpless but it doesn’t make it okay. It’s the wrong solution for several reasons. If you attack someone they may fight back. You may be severely injured or even killed. Physically attacking someone is illegal. You would likely be arrested and incarcerated. You risk losing your freedom. Incarceration is also traumatizing and bullying can and does occur there. It’s not a good experience. Having a criminal record can also ruin your chances to go to college or to get a job.
With regard to your bullies, you have a desire to “kill them.” You asked if that was normal for someone your age. No, it’s not normal for anyone at any age. I see it as a sign that you feel helpless, are suffering and lack the skills to know how to resolve this problem. Adult intervention is required.
What should you do? Every time you experience bullying, report it to the school faculty. In most schools, there is a zero tolerance policy with regard to bullying. The bullies might be suspended or even expelled from school. If they were suspended or expelled, your problem could be solved. You should also report it to your parents. They need to know what is happening even if you don’t think they will believe you. Tell them. Document the bullying. If necessary, call the police and report what is happening to you in school.
Don’t resort to violence. I have described a more appropriate strategy for dealing with the bullying and I hope you will take my advice. As I outlined above, you have a great deal to lose by engaging in violence.
Finally, if you feel that you might harm yourself or someone else, then it’s imperative to seek immediate emergency treatment. Go to the emergency room or call 911. Emergency assistance can stop you from engaging in behavior that will harm you or others. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle
Mental Health & Criminal Justice