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Can’t Trust Boyfriend

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I’m 43 and have been dating the same man for almost 9 years on and off. The issue is I dont trust him at all, I have caught him lying alot and I just feel he lies more than he is truthful. I have no way of proving this we live almost an hour from eachother. I have been starting to think I need to spy on him to see if he is truthfull. He will go out with friends when we says he is working. He has sent other women emails and had lots of naked pictures of women ( this was a few yrs ago) and he just bruses it off and sayes it has nothing to do with me.
I hate to leave him, I do love him very much but even after all these years he wont even officially be my boyfriend.
I am at my wits end and dont know what to do.
Last night he called me early at 7 pm and said he was going to his parents for dinner and would call back, he never did.
This is a constant thing we talk about 10 minutes a day, mabey.
I need help.

Can’t Trust Boyfriend

Answered by on -


Why on earth have you stayed with someone you don’t trust for 9 years? No. You shouldn’t spy on him. You have all the information you need already. He lies. He isn’t respectful of you. He won’t be your boyfriend. Stop wasting your time. Cut this guy loose and make yourself available again. You deserve to find a man who is worthy of your trust and who will love you and cherish you and spend time with you.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

Can’t Trust Boyfriend

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). Can’t Trust Boyfriend. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 19, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.