I would recommend trying therapy again. Perhaps you were not ready for therapy then but are now. You are likely very different now than you were then. You may be more motivated. In the first therapy experience, your mother may have forced you to attend. In this case, you’d be going of your own volition. Your choosing to go and being motivated to go could make the difference this time. It is worth a try.
If you decide to pursue therapy, it is important that you find someone with whom you feel comfortable. How can you achieve this? I often recommend calling 5 to 10 therapists and discussing in detail what you would like help with. Ask direct questions such as:
- Have you helped others with similar problems?
- What were the outcomes of those cases?
- How would you help me?
Ask for specifics. If you speak to a therapist with whom you feel a connection, then the next step would be to meet with him or her in person. It may take time to find the “right” therapist but when you do, it could make a significant difference in your life.
If you are not interested in therapy (which I would advise), then you may want to read several self-help books that have helped many others. I would highly recommend two books in particular: M. Scott Peck’s The Road Less Traveled and Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning.
You should also consider being evaluated by a psychiatrist. You may benefit from medication. Medication may not “solve” your problems but it can help you to feel better and to temporarily eliminate the “void” that you feel. I wish you the best. Please take care.