For the past 5 years i have had problems which keep getting worse. I have always been failing school, or only being able to do just enough to get by and not many friends even my closest ones i still feel are barley my friends, i hate myself an unbearable amount, every time i see a mirror i want to strat to cry…but i think my problems started from childhood, i was sexually assulted when i was 4 by my babysisters son. and then when i was 9 my dad walked out on our family, im lucky if i get to see him a couple times a year, or to even come to any special event. and my boyfriend of 6 months i found out was dancing with girls i clearly told him i was uncomfortable with him even talking to them. I just have the worst trust issues, i dont talk at all anymore ebcause i feel ill be judged by anyone who sees or knows of my actions, i want to know how to trust. also for the past 5 years ive been addicted to poppers (weed and unfiltered tabacoo) and ecstasy, although i stopped ecstasy a few months ago. but still if i can find any drug that takes me out of reality i will take it. Also for the past 4 months i have started to have the worst anxiety ive ever experienced with having 3 panic attacks. The worst part for me though, is to not stop thinking about death…i used to always cut myself from my arms legs to my stomach. i just wanted to get out..but it’s so different now and i dont understand why, im terrified of death, i always find myself thinking about when and how its going to happen and if i think of losing my mom everytime i ball my eyes out. and now it seems like i cant concentrate on anything for more then 5 minutes, and within the past year or so it’s literally been almost impossible for me to fall asleep everynight, but im always soo tired.. ….so my question is just basically ..do i seem like i should get some help?
Depression, Anxiety, Eating Disorder, Drugs, & Boyfriend
Yes, you should seek help. Your symptoms have become progressively worse. You are failing school. You are using drugs to escape your emotional pain. You can’t sleep. You are constantly anxious and have recently begun to experience panic attacks. Generally, panic attacks are sign that someone feels as though their life is out of control. Fearing death and being concerned about the death of those close to you are also indicators of anxiety. All of the aforementioned symptoms are signs that help is needed.
Unfortunately, untreated mental health symptoms have been part of your life for many years. As a teenager, it was probably difficult to voice your concerns, to acquire professional help or to know that you needed help. Now that you are an adult you have the power to positively change the outcome of your life.
Speak to your mother or someone you trust about seeing a mental health professional. Many people begin the process of meeting with a mental health professional by first reporting their symptoms to their primary care physician. Many primary care physicians work closely with local mental health professionals and can provide needed referrals. Psych Central has a convenient feature here in which you can enter your ZIP code and locate a list of mental health professionals in your community. With the proper help, the course of your life can change for the better. Please don’t ignore your symptoms.