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Alcoholic parents are tearing me up

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I’m sixteen years old and a senior in high school. Both of my parents are alcoholics and have been ever since I can remember. They are loud and violent when they get drunk, my dad has even been to jail for domestic violence. Its so hard living here with them constantly drunk and fighting. I have two older brothers but they both have moved out. Everything I do is wrong to them and I get scolded by my mom even if I ask her a simple question. I have suffered depression in the past and am still struggling with it because of my parents. They wont even try to change at all. I don’t know what I can do anymore; all I do is cry when I am home because all they do is scream at me and fight with me constantly. I stay at my boyfriends a lot of the time now but I still come home everyday when he is at work. I am so unhappy when I am home and it makes me scared that someday I will end up like them. People in my life don’t understand when I try to talk about it. It’s driving me crazy living here and putting me in a really bad state of mind. I don’t know what I can do about how I feel. I hate getting in the middle of their fights because then they fight with me. Its really hard dealing with this and I need some advice.

Alcoholic parents are tearing me up

Answered by on -


Thank you for writing us. You don’t need to stay or continue to tolerate an abusive environment. The first thing I would do is talk to your siblings about your home life. They lived through it and might be able to offer some guidance and direction.

I would then talk to your school’s guidance counselor. You won’t be the first student they will have helped with a difficult home situation. You may also want to talk to a supportive teacher. Finally, if things get to where you need more direct and stronger help each state has a protective service for children that you can call to get support. You can find the contact information here, and additional support here.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Alcoholic parents are tearing me up

Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp:

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Alcoholic parents are tearing me up. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 25, 2020, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018 (Originally: 30 Aug 2011)
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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