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I just don’t know what’s wrong with me

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I had a baby six months ago, after I had been having an affair for a year or so because I just felt like something was missing in my life. I got married early as I came from an abusive home and wanted to get out. My husband is a lovely man and I never want to hurt him I just know though that something is wrong. I cry sometimes for no reason, I feel compelled to do certain things and if I don’t something bad will happen and I also feel like someone is constantly watching me and monitoring my thoughts. I feel as though I’m worthless and have thoughts of suicide. I hate myself and don’t think I have a reason for being here. What is wrong with me?

A: Of course it is hard to know for certain, but there are at least three things that are pressing on you that may be contributing to your depression. First, you have just come through the physical, psychological and hormonal challenges of giving birth. Secondly, you have just had this baby with one man, while being with another. This is also an extremely difficult emotional space to occupy. Finally, your negative thoughts are making it difficult to sort through all these complex feelings.

Given all this, I would reconnect with your gynecologist and talk about it all. Ask for a recommendation for a therapist in the area, and the possibility of medicine to cope with these symptoms. The physician may be able to help you understand what your body is going through, and the therapist will help you sort out what needs to happen in your life. For other recommendations for therapy check out the find help tab at the top of the page.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

I just don’t know what’s wrong with me

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I just don’t know what’s wrong with me

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). I just don’t know what’s wrong with me. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 19, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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