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Am I depressed?

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I am 23, and I grew up in foster care from 5-12 years of age. I was adopted and when I became too difficult for them, I was sent to my adopted father’s parent’s house. I got a job as soon as I turned 16, finally went back to public school and proceeded to do all the things teens do. I drank, I smoked weed, I snuck off, dated when I wasn’t suppose to…etc. I fell in love and found I was pregnant when I was 17. I miscarried and continued the relationship with my ex. He dumped me in the emergency room. (Sad thing is I think about him more than I do about my husband.) I felt abandoned by everyone. I became self destructive and hit my all time low, by living in my car. I went to AIT (for the Army) and ended up on border patrol. I met and married my husband within a month’s time. Our relationship was “perfect” when we were both making money and had a stable environment on border patrol. We moved back home and he started doing drugs, we fought constantly and anytime I wanted to leave, he’d remind me I had no where to go. I found out I was pregnant and things changed. He joined the Army and we have been at Fort Campbell ever since. I now have been married for almost 5 years and we have two children together. I feel trapped though. I don’t know if I really love him or not. I care for him, but there is no sparks anymore. He drinks when he is home and I am left with the kids 24/7. Deployments are worse and I currently don’t feel like cleaning, I don’t feel like cooking or even taking care of my kids whom I LOVE to pieces. I found my biological family last May and my fairytale of finding my real family was short lived. I hate my mom, I dislike my dad. I feel like I am going to end up being just like them and hurting my children. My mother and both of my brothers are bipolar, I haven’t been diagnosed. I use to see and hear things all the time and here recently I have started seeing and hearing things again. Am I depressed? Do I need to see a counselor? I don’t know what I need to do. I feel helpless and I HATE it. I feel like I am no longer my own person.

Am I depressed?

Answered by on -

A.

Thank you for writing about your history and your current struggle. I think it is the right thing to do to see a counselor. Since you are on the base there are services you can receive there. I would encourage you to make the appointment now. I would not wait for the stressors in your life to build up. You owe it to yourself, your husband and most of all your children to get some help. A combination of medicine and therapy will most likely help, so in addition to the counselor’s appointment you should have a physical done as well and talk to the physician about your situation.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Am I depressed?

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: http://www.dare2behappy.com/. He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Am I depressed?. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 25, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2011/05/16/am-i-depressed-3/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.