It sounds to me like the diagnosis of depression may have been correct. As you found out, medication alone isn’t helpful. Medication can lift your mood but it can’t help you learn how to interact more successfully with other people. I doubt that you need to be a “bastard” in order to be more interesting to women and more able to take care of yourself with friends of both sexes. It sounds to me like you have learned that the best way to get along is to go along with whatever other people want. Yes, that eliminates conflict. But it also means that people don’t get to know who you really are. When they are with you, they only see some reflection back of themselves. If people wanted to be friends only with themselves, they would make friends with mirrors. People want the give and take and interesting experiences that come with understanding and responding to differences.
I urge you to get into therapy. Find a therapist who specializes in mood disorders. Then work collaboratively with your psychiatrist and your therapist to treat this long-standing depression. From where I sit, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. The real world can be just as interesting and exciting as a fantasy game if you know how to play in it.
I wish you well.