I’m sure your parents meant well but their overparenting has left you underconfident. Now that you’re in your 20s, it’s time for what I call a “healthy rebellion.” A healthy rebellion doesn’t require that you be angry or confrontational. A healthy rebellion simply means doing what is good for you but doing so with tact and caring. You don’t need to blow out of the house with angry words and recriminations. You don’t need to stop loving these people who love you. But it’s time to stop using your upbringing and your folks’ controlling behavior as an excuse for not assuming your position as an adult in the world.
As I know you realize, you didn’t have to become a real estate agent. You don’t have to work in your mother’s office. You don’t have to live at home. You are choosing to follow your parents’ directions.
You do have a degree. You are obviously intelligent. You have your own dreams and your own opinions. You have the right and the ability to make your own choices.
Of course, “rebelling” and taking charge of your life means that your success or failure becomes entirely to your credit or blame. That’s going to be a big shift for all of you. No one would blame you a bit if it seems scary. No one would blame you for feeling overwhelmed. But I think the fact that you wrote to us means that you are getting ready to take some positive action and that you have what it takes.
Your parents won’t be here forever. It’s important that you find out for yourself what you’re made of and that you can set and reach your own goals.
I wish you well.