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Obsessive thoughts of infidelity

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I am a female who have obsessive thoughts about fictional and real life women who have had numerous affairs. The women are married and promiscuous. I am afraid of watching tv shows and movies and reading books that may or may not have adulterous wives. I am afraid of dealing with new thoughts. I even try to do research online as to why wives cheat and how many men the wife cheats on her husband with.

Obsessive thoughts of infidelity

Answered by on -


“Never waste jealousy on a real man: it is the imaginary man that supplants us all in the long run.” – — George Bernard Shaw

My guess is that since you noted your age as mid-30s and single that you are concerned about whether you can make a commitment. Since you are so concerned about women who cheat on their husbands you may be worried that you might make a commitment to a man only to find yourself drawn to others and tempted with infidelity.

If this sounds right to you I would look for a therapy group for singles in your area to explore your concerns. If this somehow seems off make an appointment with a therapist (here is a referral list) to discuss your concerns.

By dealing with your fears directly it is likely these thoughts will diminish.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan

Obsessive thoughts of infidelity

Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Dan Tomasulo Ph.D., TEP, MFA, MAPP teaches Positive Psychology in the graduate program of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, Teachers College and works with Martin Seligman, the Father of Positive Psychology in the Masters of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program at the University of Pennsylvania. He is Director of the New York Certification in Positive Psychology for the Open Center in New York City and on faculty at New Jersey City University. Sharecare has honored him as one of the top 10 online influencers on the topic of depression. For more information go to: He also writes for Psych Central's Ask the Therapist column and the Proof Positive blog.

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2018). Obsessive thoughts of infidelity. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 23, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
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