A few nights back, a friend was watching Stargate on the couch and I was reading in the next room when I suddenly had the thought; ‘he’s watching the wrong Stargate episode, he’s passed into an alternate dimension where this episode ends differently. If I don’t tell him now he’ll never see the true end of Stargate and the entire program will change forever’. So I race to the next room because I don’t have much time before it’s too late. I try to convince him that he’s got to turn off the DVD player right now otherwise he’ll never see the true episode ending but all my words are coming out wrong. Everytime I try to explain the sentence gets jumbled and I can’t think of the right words. He doesn’t turn it off, I get hysterical and try to draw a diagram instead. He still doesn’t turn it off and I go to bed, hating him for not understanding before it was too late and the episode was changed forever.
I’m worried that this might become more frequent and what it could mean concerning my mental health. It’s only happened once before, when I was younger, that time I felt that snakes were going to crawl up the sides of my bed and kill me.
This experience got me thinking about other ‘behaviours’ of mine that I’m now also worrying about.
My memory is getting worse than usual, I can’t remember instructions or lists longer than 3 and people feel that I don’t listen because I just can’t remember whole conversations. I ‘know’ that I can control the pitch of ‘sounds’, for example; a car’s indicator, when it beeps I can make it sound lower or higher, I’ve played with other similar sounds as well. Worst of all, I zone out for good whiles at a time and my words sometimes become jumbled because I’m thinking too much. I didn’t notice it was strange until people told me it was, which worries me the most because what other things do I do that others don’t do then?
What other kinds of behaviour should I look out for? Does this sound like schizophrenia or something else?Mind Feels Like It Is Falling Apart
Mind Feels Like It Is Falling Apart
The latest episode involving your friend and the television show Stargate is concerning. As far as I can tell, there’s nothing logical to prompt your strong emotional reaction. The other concern is that when you attempted to speak your speech was jumbled and incoherent.
Problems with language have been associated with psychosis and with schizophrenia in particular. You also described problems with memory, feeling like you are “zoned out” and a belief that you can control sounds. Those symptoms may also be indicative of a psychotic disorder like schizophrenia.
Please keep in mind that it is difficult to determine an individual’s diagnosis over the Internet. I cannot say with certainty whether you have schizophrenia or any other disorder. An in-person mental health evaluation may be able to determine a diagnosis and guide you to treatment. If you are potentially developing a disorder, early intervention could significantly decrease your symptoms and possibly eliminate future episodes.
Therapy and medication are two treatments to consider. How could a therapist help you? He or she could teach you how to deal with your symptoms. Also, a therapist can help you become grounded in reality. You could go to the therapist with questions such as: “Is my behavior normal? Is my thinking logical? Should I be concerned about this behavior?” I think that type of intervention would be advantageous.
How could a psychiatrist help you? He or she could prescribe medication that may decrease your symptoms. The combination of therapy and medication may be able to reduce or eliminate your symptoms.
With regard to your question about behaviors of concern, there is a long list of potential behaviors that one could be concerned about, too many to name. The symptoms you mentioned are concerning for the reasons described earlier.
As I mentioned, I do not know with certainty if you have a mental health disorder. It is wise to be proactive and to seek help when there is a problem. You may be able to find a therapist in your community by going to this website and searching through their list of therapists. A therapist may be able to refer you to a psychiatrist. Another way to access help is to ask your primary care physician for a referral to a mental health professional. Thanks for your question.