Depression is one possibility. It is also possible that you have an underlying medical condition. You mentioned having blood tests at the age of 10. How thorough were those blood tests? Have you had blood tests since that time? Also, you may need more than one blood test to determine if there is an underlying medical condition. It is important to rule out a medical condition. I would suggest discussing your symptoms with a doctor.
One condition to explore further may be chronic fatigue syndrome. The hallmark of this disorder is fatigue, to the point of restricting one’s activities as well as feeling unrested, even after sleeping for an adequate amount of time. Other symptoms may include muscle aches and soreness, forgetfulness, headaches, fever and sore throat. Another related medical condition to explore is the Epstein-Barr virus. Both disorders affect the body’s immune system. The New York Times recently published an informative article about chronic fatigue syndrome. The article discusses a virus called xenotropic murine leukemia virus-related virus, or XMRV, that has been recently discovered in relation to chronic fatigue syndrome. If you want to read more about this please click here to be taken to the New York Times website.
It’s best to approach this problem in a two-pronged way. One, as I mentioned above, is to explore the possibility of an underlying medical condition. This you could do by researching possible disorders as well as being evaluated by a physician. The second thing you might consider is being evaluated by a mental health professional. There are several advantages to this. One is that he or she could evaluate you and determine whether you have depression. The second advantage is that he or she may be able to advise you about how to deal with your symptoms. The counselor may have suggestions about how to overcome the issues you have written about.
At this time, it is unclear whether you have depression or an underlying medical condition, but one thing is certain: you are not enjoying life as much as you should. Yes, you are alive and are going through the motions on a daily basis but you are not living up to your life’s potential. You referenced this in your letter. There’s much more you could be doing that you’re not and this can be corrected. Please consider my advice. Please believe me there is help out there that can give you the quality of life that you desire and deserve.