Your behavior may very likely be caused by hormones but it is difficult to known what the exact cause is. It may be that the stress of a new baby has amplified your OCD-like behavior or for whatever reason, it could be that you’re simply more aware of it.
While you may never know the exact cause of your behavior it is good that you know it exists. Because you recognize that it occurs, you can work to change it.
You’ll need to make a conscious effort to stop yourself from engaging in illogical and irrational behavior. I will use the examples you provided in your letter to explain.
If you feel the urge to run to the computer to look something up online but you don’t have time or it’s not important, stop yourself from going. Don’t go, then try to stop thinking that you have to go. You don’t have to. Why would you have to go? Thinking that you have to go is something you are imposing on yourself. When you think about it, this makes no sense.
Lets take the example of when you are getting ready to feed the baby, you start to feel that you need to put all of the bags away first before the baby can eat. Why do the bags need to be away before the baby can be fed? What logical reason exists to explain why the baby cannot eat if the bags are left out? I cannot think of any reason that makes sense. Again, this is a self-imposed “rule” that you have created that somehow makes you feel better. Putting the bags away seems to make you feel less anxious and that is true but it is illogical.
But instead of running over to put the bags away, force yourself to feed the baby without putting the bags away, even if it makes you feel anxious. You will feel anxious for a little while but it will soon subside. Shift your thinking or focus on something else.
The idea here is not to give in to your anxiety. Use logic and reason to understand that it makes absolutely no sense to follow these self-imposed rules that you have placed on yourself and on things. Realize that you have the power to stop yourself from engaging in this unwanted behavior.
If you continue to have difficulty controlling your behavior and thoughts see a therapist. In therapy you can learn how to better control your behavior as well as gain needed support and guidance. Thanks for writing. Take care.